bride-of-bucky:

I’m barred for life.

Now you’re dead. Ban’s void.

I can’t find a pulse.

speakeasytherapy:

allkillernofiller:

accidentally bumps into someone

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"you don’t have to keep apologizing" 

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once upon a quote + our “humble” gentlemen (◡‿◡✿)

alexbluebonnets:

Holy shit.

alexbluebonnets:

Holy shit.

thegits:

IT’S ADORABLE FACE!!!

thegits:

IT’S ADORABLE FACE!!!

worldofthecutestcuties:

Put my son to sleep in his new onesie, woke up to a bear raiding my drawers.

worldofthecutestcuties:

Put my son to sleep in his new onesie, woke up to a bear raiding my drawers.

See that, I gave it a name. Now it’s a thing.

contraception:

a support group for people who started saying YAAAAAAS ironically and now can’t stop

worldofthecutestcuties:

Someone at the Wisconsin Humane Society is really good at naming cats.

worldofthecutestcuties:

Someone at the Wisconsin Humane Society is really good at naming cats.

But I’m trying to help my f r i e n d s.

sarcastic-snowflake:

So every morning I get off the train and start my 20 minute walk to work, and there’s this guy who’s always like 3 steps ahead of me and always beats me to the street corner bc I get stopped by the light and he passes it. but today I was ahead of him for the first time and he RUNS in front of me, turns around and goes “I’ve been winning for 2 months now, can’t stop now, have a good day, see you tomorrow.”  tmrw I swear i’m wearing running shoes to work.